{"id":18653,"date":"2025-10-06T09:00:25","date_gmt":"2025-10-06T06:00:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.kariyer.net\/ik-blog\/?p=18653"},"modified":"2025-10-02T20:52:15","modified_gmt":"2025-10-02T17:52:15","slug":"olumsuz-girdaptan-cikis-rehberi-bir-vaka-analizi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.kariyer.net\/ik-blog\/olumsuz-girdaptan-cikis-rehberi-bir-vaka-analizi\/","title":{"rendered":"Olumsuz girdaptan \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f rehberi: Bir vaka analizi"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u0130\u015f yerinde k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir ele\u015ftiri sizi saatlerce me\u015fgul eden bir f\u0131rt\u0131naya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015febilir. Bunu fark etmek ve i\u00e7sel sabotajc\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 y\u00f6netmek kariyerinizi kontrol alt\u0131na alman\u0131n ilk ad\u0131m\u0131d\u0131r. \u00c7al\u0131\u015fan Ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 Dan\u0131\u015fman\u0131 Bertay Fi\u015fek\u00e7i, konuyla ilgili \u00f6nerilerini bu yaz\u0131s\u0131nda sizin i\u00e7in payla\u015ft\u0131.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ge\u00e7enlerde bir dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131m, y\u00f6neticisinin ortak alandaki bir da\u011f\u0131n\u0131kl\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00f6sterip, “Buras\u0131 \u00e7\u00f6pl\u00fck gibi olmu\u015f,” dedi\u011fi an\u0131 anlatt\u0131… D\u0131\u015far\u0131dan bak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda basit, hatta anl\u0131k bir geri besleme gibi g\u00f6r\u00fcnebilir; ancak bu c\u00fcmlenin dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7 d\u00fcnyas\u0131nda tetikledi\u011fi \u015fey, basit bir tepkiden \u00e7ok daha fazlas\u0131yd\u0131: Bir olumsuz girdap.<\/strong><\/p>\n

O an hissettikleri \u015funlard\u0131: Utan\u00e7, yetersizlik, “Beni su\u00e7luyor,” d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesi ve oradan ka\u00e7\u0131p saklanma iste\u011fi. Bu tek bir olay, g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u00fcn geri kalan\u0131n\u0131, hatta haftas\u0131n\u0131 etkileyen bir olumsuzluk sarmal\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Bu hikaye size tan\u0131d\u0131k geliyor mu?<\/p>\n

Bir\u00e7ok profesyonel, kariyerlerinde benzer f\u0131rt\u0131nalar ya\u015far. K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir ele\u015ftiri, g\u00f6zden ka\u00e7an bir e-posta veya bir i\u015f arkada\u015f\u0131n\u0131n imal\u0131 bir s\u00f6z\u00fc, bizi saatlerce, hatta g\u00fcnlerce me\u015fgul eden bir zihinsel ve duygusal karma\u015fan\u0131n i\u00e7ine \u00e7eker. Peki, bu girdab\u0131 yaratan nedir ve daha da \u00f6nemlisi, i\u00e7inden nas\u0131l \u00e7\u0131k\u0131l\u0131r?<\/p>\n

F\u0131rt\u0131nay\u0131 ba\u015flatanlar: \u0130\u00e7sel sabotajc\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131z<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Sorun, y\u00f6neticinin s\u00f6yledi\u011fi “\u00e7\u00f6pl\u00fck” kelimesi de\u011fildir. Sorun, o kelimeyi al\u0131p bir felaket senaryosuna d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcren zihnimizdeki seslerdir. Bunlara \u00a0“Sabotajc\u0131lar”<\/strong> diyebiliriz.<\/p>\n

Dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131m\u0131n durumunda, “Yarg\u0131\u00e7” sabotajc\u0131s\u0131 an\u0131nda devreye girdi ve f\u0131s\u0131ldamaya ba\u015flad\u0131:<\/p>\n

    \n
  • “Rezil oldun, batt\u0131n, bittin.”<\/em><\/li>\n
  • “Seni a\u015fa\u011f\u0131l\u0131yor, \u00e7ocuk musun sen?”<\/em><\/li>\n
  • “\u0130\u015fte yine ba\u015faramad\u0131n, bu i\u015f yerinde de tutunamayacaks\u0131n.”<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    Bu sesler, \u00f6zellikle ge\u00e7mi\u015fteki olumsuz deneyimlerden (\u00f6nceki i\u015finde benzer bir durum, ge\u00e7en hafta ba\u015fka bir arkada\u015f\u0131yla ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 olay gibi) beslenerek daha da g\u00fc\u00e7lenebilir ve bask\u0131n hale geldi\u011finde \u201cdavran\u0131\u015flar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131\u201d tetikleyebilir. Her yeni olumsuz olay, eski yaralar\u0131 kanatan bir tetikleyiciye de d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015febilir.<\/p>\n

    Sonu\u00e7ta ki\u015fi, olay\u0131n kendisiyle de\u011fil, kafas\u0131n\u0131n i\u00e7inde yaratt\u0131\u011f\u0131 devasa f\u0131rt\u0131nayla bo\u011fu\u015fmaya ba\u015flar. Savunmac\u0131 tepkiler verebilir, kendini izole edebilir ve motivasyonunu kaybedebilir. Bu olumsuz olay\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmekten performans\u0131 d\u00fc\u015febilir, ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 azalabilir.<\/p>\n

    Olumsuz girdaptan \u00e7\u0131kman\u0131n 3 pratik ad\u0131m\u0131<\/strong><\/h2>\n

    Bu girdaptan \u00e7\u0131kmak, “pozitif d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmaktan” \u00e7ok daha fazlas\u0131n\u0131 gerektirir. Bu, zihinsel bir kas\u0131 bilin\u00e7li olarak \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmakt\u0131r.<\/p>\n

    \u0130\u015fte dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131ma \u00f6nerdi\u011fim ve sizin de hemen uygulayabilece\u011finiz \u00fc\u00e7 pratik ad\u0131m:<\/p>\n

    Fark et ve isimlendir: “O ses sen de\u011filsin”<\/strong><\/h3>\n

    \u0130lk ve en g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc ad\u0131m, o i\u00e7sel ele\u015ftirel sesi duydu\u011funuzda, onun siz olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 fark etmektir. O, sizin “Yarg\u0131\u00e7” sabotajc\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n sesi. Sadece “A, evet. Yarg\u0131c\u0131m yine konu\u015fuyor,” diyerek bile, o sesle aran\u0131za bir mesafe koyars\u0131n\u0131z. Onu kendinizle \u00f6zde\u015fle\u015ftirmeyi b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z an, g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u00fc kaybetmeye ba\u015flar.<\/p>\n

    An\u0131 durdur ve fiziksel olarak uzakla\u015f<\/strong><\/h3>\n

    Dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131m\u0131n yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi, o an\u0131n ate\u015finden kendinizi fiziksel olarak uzakla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131n. Bir tuvalete gidin, koridorda y\u00fcr\u00fcy\u00fcn, bir bardak su al\u0131n. Bu 2 dakikal\u0131k mola s\u0131ras\u0131nda, zihninizi susturup bedeninize odaklan\u0131n. Ellerinizi birbirine s\u00fcrt\u00fcn, nefesinizi dinleyin. Bu basit al\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmalar, beyninizin alarm veren “hayatta kalma” modundan, sakin ve bilge moduna ge\u00e7mesine yard\u0131mc\u0131 olur.<\/p>\n

    Kendinle y\u00fczle\u015fmenin en g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc yolu: Olay\u0131 kaydet<\/strong><\/h3>\n

    Bu, dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131ma verdi\u011fim en \u00f6nemli \u00f6devdi. Sizi olumsuz etkileyen bir olay oldu\u011funda, hemen sonras\u0131nda, o an\u0131n ate\u015fi s\u00f6nmeden bir yere oturun ve olanlar\u0131 yaz\u0131n veya telefonunuza sesli olarak kaydedin:<\/p>\n

      \n
    • Ne oldu?<\/strong> (Objektif olarak: “Y\u00f6neticim X c\u00fcmlesini kurdu.”)<\/li>\n
    • Ne hissettim?<\/strong> (Duygusal olarak: “Utan\u00e7, \u00f6fke, yetersizlik hissettim.”)<\/li>\n
    • Sabotajc\u0131m ne s\u00f6yledi?<\/strong> (Zihinsel olarak: “\u0130\u00e7imdeki ses ‘yine beceremedin’ dedi.”)<\/li>\n
    • Nas\u0131l tepki verdim?<\/strong> (Davran\u0131\u015fsal olarak: “Savunmac\u0131 bir cevap verdim ve sonras\u0131nda pi\u015fman oldum.”)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      Bu dok\u00fcmantasyon, sizi olay\u0131n kurban\u0131 olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p kendi durumunuzun g\u00f6zlemcisi haline getirir. Bu kay\u0131tlar\u0131 biriktirdik\u00e7e, kendi sabotajc\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma prensiplerini, sizi hangi durumlarda tetikledi\u011fini bir harita gibi g\u00f6rmeye ba\u015flars\u0131n\u0131z.<\/p>\n

      Bu harita, bir sonraki f\u0131rt\u0131nada hangi rotay\u0131 izlemeniz gerekti\u011fini size g\u00f6sterecek en de\u011ferli rehberiniz olacakt\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc kimse size bir \u015fey “hissettiremez”.<\/p>\n

      Olaylara verdi\u011finiz anlam\u0131 ve tepkiyi de\u011fi\u015ftirme g\u00fcc\u00fc her zaman sizdedir ve bunun fark\u0131na vard\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda hayat\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 ve kariyerinizi daha \u00e7ok elinize alm\u0131\u015f olursunuz.<\/p>\n\n

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      \u0130\u015f yerinde k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir ele\u015ftiri sizi saatlerce me\u015fgul eden bir f\u0131rt\u0131naya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015febilir. Bunu fark etmek ve i\u00e7sel sabotajc\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 y\u00f6netmek kariyerinizi kontrol alt\u0131na alman\u0131n ilk ad\u0131m\u0131d\u0131r. \u00c7al\u0131\u015fan Ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 Dan\u0131\u015fman\u0131 Bertay Fi\u015fek\u00e7i, konuyla ilgili \u00f6nerilerini bu yaz\u0131s\u0131nda sizin i\u00e7in payla\u015ft\u0131. Ge\u00e7enlerde bir dan\u0131\u015fan\u0131m, y\u00f6neticisinin ortak alandaki bir da\u011f\u0131n\u0131kl\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00f6sterip, “Buras\u0131 \u00e7\u00f6pl\u00fck gibi olmu\u015f,” dedi\u011fi an\u0131 anlatt\u0131… D\u0131\u015far\u0131dan […]<\/p>\n\n

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